My gut response, in each of these cases is to let all these people do exactly what they want, because what they want is to raise and love a child, and they want it so much that they are prepared to risk prejudice, opprobrium and ostracism to do so. I do not want a child in this way; I never have and never will. But I have spent the last ten years or so working with damaged, delinquent and often deeply fifteen year old troubled teenaged children in colleges, special exclusion units and young offenders institutions. One of my most memorable pupils cracked my collarbone. Not because he attacked me, but because I got between him and the wall he was trying to smash his face into. The only emotional vocabulary he had to express his strongest feelings was violence. He had evolved one step further then his parents, though, because unlike them (and most of his peers) he turned that violence in himself and didn't inflict it on others.
His was, of course, an extreme case, but as far as I can recall, every single really behaviourally-challenged (to use the newspeak preferred by the education system) pupil I have ever encountered was the product of a 'normal', heterosexual, unassisted conception. So I have no qualms whatever about protesting for the rights of 'alternative' families. So I couldn't care less if is someone is so kinky that they dress up as a purple plushy wombat and masturbate baying to the full moon and wear a spike-studded strap-on permanently rotovating their anus, providing they give the children in their care stable, supportive loving homes.
All the mealy-mouthed liberal and not so liberal hand-wringing about cases like the one in Germany make me angry. Just as every time I read about another expensive enquiry that has been set up to ponder the ethics of giving babies to those who passionately want them I fume, and wish the money and effort was spent not on pontificating about the rights of putative parents, but salvaging the wrongs created by existing ones.
Crossposted to theladiesloos